pirated pirate jokes

12 pirated pirate jokes from listoftheday.blogspot.com


12. Have you heard about the new pirate movie?
It's rated AARRRRRR! Why? Because of all the booty!


11. Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they can spend years at C


10. A pirate walks into a bar wearing a paper towel on his head. He sits down at the bar and orders some dirty rum.

The bartender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?"

"Arrrrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!"


9. How did the pirate stop smoking?
He used the patch


8, What's a horny pirate's worst nightmare?
A sunken chest with no booty


7. A little boy with a speech impediment dresses up as a pirate for Halloween.

At the first house a woman opens the door, and the boy says, "I'm a birate. This is my barrot. Can I have some bandy?"

The woman looks at him and says, "My, aren't you cute. But where are your buccaneers?"

The boy gets angry: "On the side of my buckin head, you buckin idiot."


6. What was the pirate's name who had no legs or arms and fell overboard?
Captain Bob


5. What does a Dyslexic Pirate Say?
RRAAAAAAAAAAA!


4. How much did it cost the pirate to pierce his ears?
A buck an ear!!! ARRRRR!


3. Where did the one legged pirate go for breakfast?
IHOP


2. Why are pirates called pirates?
They just aRRRRRRRR


1. A pirate enters the men's room, steps up to a urinal, opens his fly and out pops a steering wheel. The guys at the other urinals can't help but notice.

"Whoa," one says. "You have a steering wheel instead of a penis?!"

"Aye," says the pirate. "It's drivin' me nuts!"

ye olde kittehs

McCall Cover, Joan Caulfield
Originally uploaded by George Eastman House

i love em!

SEXY PEOPLE

SEXY PEOPLE

I LOVE OTTO the KITTEH

special FX

someday ... someday ... I hope and pray Adam's films' special effects will be thusly produced:

the real house of blues

House of blues is 'ridiculous' | The Sun |News

Ooo Eee Ahh Ohh!

Listen to all 36 tracks... including 16 b-sides and rarities
at checkyourhead.beastieboys.com

The winner is ...

HaPpY EaStEr To aLL mAh BuNnAhS!

Adam chose to prepare Roasted Asparagus as our second side for Easter dinner. We're packing up the car and the dog and heading 2 hours away to Jax! Here's the recipe for y'all:

Roasted Shallot & Sesame Asparagus

• 2 1/2 pounds asparagus, trimmed
  
• 1 1/2 tablespoons olive oil
  
• 2 tablespoons minced shallot
  
• 2 tablespoons sesame seeds, toasted lightly
  
• fresh lemon juice to taste
  

In a large shallow baking dish toss the asparagus with the oil, coating it well, and bake it in a preheated 500°F. oven, shaking the dish every 2 minutes, for 6 to 8 minutes, or until it is almost al dente. Sprinkle the asparagus with the shallot and the sesame seeds, bake it for 1 minute, or until it is al dente, and sprinkle it with the lemon juice and salt to taste.

Depth of Field Bracelet

Awesome: TTL Lens Bracelets What a great concept. Love it.

I LOVE EASTER BUNNIES

Exponential singing bunnies!!

easter side dishes

We're planning to go up to Jax for Easter dinner. We have a chance to go to the Easter Saturday Vigil, so we are ... then we can prepare for Sunday dinner at mom's. We were asked to make sides and I thought first of Moroccan Carrots and then something green. Usually for dinners with the family, the main course is the center of attention, and with mom's cooking and generousity, rightly so. I like to try and do something at least half-healthy so there are choices. Adam & I tried out a recipe from Gourmet Magazine's Cookbook:

Moroccan-Style Carrots

• 1/2 pound carrots, cut diagonally into 1/4-inch-thick slices (we use baby carrots!)
  
• 1 small garlic clove, minced
  
• 1 1/2 tablespoons olive oil
  
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cumin
  
• 1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
  
• 1/2 teaspoon sugar
  
• a pinch of cayenne
  
• 2 teaspoons fresh lemon juice, or to taste

Steam the carrots, covered, for 8 minutes, or until they are just tender. In a skillet cook the garlic in the oil over moderately low heat, stirring, for 1 minute, or until it is fragrant, add the cumin, the cinnamon, the sugar, the cayenne, and the carrots, and cook the mixture, stirring, for 1 minute, or until the carrots are well-coated with the mixture. Stir in the lemon juice and salt and pepper to taste, transfer the carrots to a bowl, and let them cool to room temperature.

I'm not exactly certain what our second dish to pass will be, I thought of roasted brussels sprouts, but I remembered the time we brought Rumaki and it almost made my brother-in-law barf when he found out what it was. So probably something more "normal" should be on his plate. Asparagus? Green Beans? Not sure. Something green. Must compute.

Oreo Whats?!

These look so naughty and wrong, but the cream cheese makes me think they're yummy.: Oreo Cookie Truffles

new fave blog!

I don't know who runs carriewhiteburnsinhell.blogspot.com but we should hang out and drink and get out VHS tapes. My tapes would have a lot more cartoons, but I think we would appreciate each other very much.

Sorry I Missed Your Party

Not exactly safe for work: http://www.sorryimissedyourparty.com/ Photos of other peoples' parties. Gross!

coping strategies